get real.

so im getting terrible at blogging... of course, i am still reading them, but just not participating in them...

im exhausted... but i dont think its because a lack of sleep. that could totally be part of it but i think its more just an emotional exhaustion. i dont even want to talk about it bc ill probably start crying but basically i just miss home. and im not even sure where that is anymore. its another one of those times where i remember that this place is not my home.

Easter is my favorite season and holiday of all, but i havent taken the time to enjoy it. ive been lazy and selfish. hate admitting that but truth hurts. i have so many things to be thankful. why am i not focusing on them? why did Jesus make the biggest, most costly, sacrifice anyone could ask for, and i am sitting here in self pity?

Jesus. I confess that I have been selfish. I confess my doubt and unbelief. I confess my messed up priorities. Did I confess my selfishness? Lord, forgive me.

I cannot say thank you enough for your sacrifice of giving your life for ME. You didnt have to, but You chose to. its mind boggling. I am thankful even though I know I haven't been living in a way that would show my deepest gratitude. i will start now. Jesus you are good. Your love abounds. Your grace is sufficient. Forgive me.