friday night...

the more i seek you,
the more i find you,
the more i find you,
the more i love you.
i want to sit at your feet,
drink from the cup in your hand,
lay back against and breath,
feel your heartbeat,
this love is so deep,
its more then i can stand,
i melt in your peace
its overwhelming.
-kari jobe

This friday night, as I sit on the couch, I'm a bit overwhelmed, not in a stressed out way, but more in a 'I need Jesus' in a desperate way. The God of the UNIVERSE wants and desires a relationship with me. How do I accept that? I'm so guilty in everyway. I deserve death, but for some reason the Lord continues to give me my every breath. I do not deserve my life, but since the Lord continues to give it to me, I want to give it back to Him.
I need a healing. I need a new. I need a fresh. I need Him. I don't want to be sad. Fill me with YOUR joy Lord!! I know you are good, I know you are faithful, I know you are there, even when I am sad and overwhelmed and can't see. I know and believe before I see. I think that is what faith is. Give me faith Father!

phil. 2:3

life is funny. people are funny. the things we do... the things we do out of selfishness or angry or sadness... we are strange people. dont you wonder... why the heck did i just do that? or why the heck did he/she/ they do that? i think probably about 95% of my mistakes are made out of pure selfishness to try to make myself feel better. how gross. how does God not get so fed up with forgiving me? how does He not get tired of picking me back up and setting me on my feet time after time? i get sick of myself for crying out loud, HOW DOES HE NOT? i mean i know i deserve a good kick in the butt most of the time... and maybe occassionally i will get that, but the majority of the time God just says, 'sara, get up. i forgive you. i love you. no. matter. what. i'm not giving up on you, so dont give up on yourself.' Lord, teach me to 'do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility, to consider others better then myself.' -phil 2:3 and give me the strength to do that.

cant sleep

its 12:43 am... I should be sleeping. I am getting up to run 4 miles with amanda and elizabeth in the morning and I just want to be sleeping. But I guess since I have this time, I should reflect on today and how incredibly grateful I am for a family who supports me beyond what I deserve. Thank you grandma, papa, grandma, grand-dad, mike, lisa, ryan, steph, mark, michelle, danny, tacey, kenny, bobby, angie, tammy, dave, nicole, justin, melissa, mom, dad, sis, thomas, sheri, peggy, elizabeth, johnny, brooke, caleigh, becca, and anyone else who was praying and fasting for me today!! It was a beautiful day and did feel covered in prayer! I had a new sense of energy today and of gratefulness. (I think I am waking up andrea with my typing and I should probably stop) but I just wanted to say thank you and words are nothing to show my appreciation and thankfulness!!

blessed beyond words!

I got a phone call on Monday from my cousin Justin, who is basically like my older brother, telling me that he has called together my family to fast for me on Thursday! So tomorrow my whole family is fasting for ME and praying for my journey to Slovenia. They are giving me the money that they would have spent on food that day plus whatever else they were planning on giving me! WOW!! I mean how does someone even begin to say thank you!! I have told a few friends and they are going to be joining in fasting and some in prayer with us tomorrow! So if anyone would like to join in fasting or prayer tomorrow, that would be awesome!! I hope Justin knows how much he has blessed my life! He is the most thoughtful person I know!! I love you cuz!!

just for you girl!

How are you supposed to start your very first sentence of a brand new blog? I guess I could start with thanking Amanda Taylor (who I am dedicating this first blog to) for introducing me to blogging and then tell about how much we laughed trying to think of a title for my blog... Since I am going to SLOvenia, we thought we should try to be clever and come up with a title that rhymes with slo... hahaha!! So being that Amanda is very creative, we went to the rhyming dictionary online and looked up things that rhymed with slow... Needless to say, she was creative in her ryhmes and I got quite the laugh out of it... but none made the cut! I made the final decision to be Joyfully... (obviously)

I guess ultimately I picked that word because I wanted it to be a reminder... through good and bad, God is still God and He is still good and I can rest in the sheer JOY that my God is faithful to never leave or forsake me! I have something to be joyful about and I want to live my life in that way that people see the JOY He ALONE brings :)

So be encouraged today that even when we are "faithless, HE WILL REMAIN FAITHFUL" - 2 timothy 2:13

hi my name is sara and i will grow in slo and make cookie dough and then go mow or maybe sew fo sho ya know foe...